Intervention: Zoe

April 25, 2014

zoe1

Dear Zoe,

You are a good kitty.  From the first day I saw you, I knew that you were special.  Even though you bobbed your head uncontrollably and couldn’t hear a word I said, I still felt strangely connected to you.  If I’m not mistaken, you felt the same way about me.  We bonded quickly, and ever since the day I saw you, you have been a shining light in my life because you make me smile and laugh almost every day.

At noon, you proclaimed (through sign language), "It's 5 o'clock somewhere!" before chugging a bottle of tequila.  You become violent on tequila.  You directed your irrational anger onto Blind Murphy and Elvis for "looking at you funny" (we think that's what you signed; it's hard to tell what you are signing when you've had too much to drink).  We were relieved when you finally passed out two hours later.

At noon, you proclaimed (through sign language), “It’s 5 o’clock somewhere!” before chugging a bottle of tequila. You become violent on tequila. You directed your irrational anger onto Blind Murphy and Elvis for “looking at you funny” (we think that’s what you signed; it’s hard to tell what you are signing when you’ve had too much to drink). We were relieved when you finally passed out two hours later.

 

Through slurred sign language, you say that you do not have a problem and for us to mind our own business.  For fear of inciting your wrath, we have remained quiet and have simply stayed out of your way when you hit the sauce.  We sit silent as we watch you pee in the dining room’s water fountain.  We ignore the bullying taunts.  We walk away when you force yourself into others’ food bowls while they are eating from them. But none of us can do that anymore because you are slowly killing yourself.  That is why Partner, Mr. Tiddles, Reese, Blind Murphy, Elvis, and I are here today.  We want to save you from yourself before it’s too late.

You had crawled into my lap after a rum and coke bender telling me how much you loved me ("I love you, man.  Really.  Like, I really love you, man.") before passing out.  What you can't see in this picture is me crying because this was taken on the day you lost your job at the children's hospital as a therapy pet because you were starting to antagonize the patients because "they were looking at" you "funny."

You had crawled into my lap after a rum and coke bender telling me how much you loved me (“I love you, man. Really. Like, I really love you, man.”) before passing out. What you can’t see in this picture is me crying because this was taken on the day you lost your job at the children’s hospital as a therapy pet because you were starting to antagonize the patients because “they were looking at” you “funny.”

 

You don’t relalize it (because you’re not sober long enough to understand), but your actions cause hurt and pain to the ones that want to love you.  Blind Murphy is now afraid to walk anywhere for fear of you jumping out and attacking him.  Elvis is losing his hair from the stress you cause.  My monthly budget of peroxide and bandages has tripled, and I just can’t afford that anymore.  Reese is depressed all the time (she’s now shops at Hot Topic and wears thick black eye-liner and is thinking of dying her hair black), and Mr. Tiddles doesn’t want to be around because you may show up and start calling him names again like ‘Tubby’ or ‘Lard-o-lakes butter.’  And it’s all because of you.  You and your love of hard liquor.

Taken at 10:13 am right before we had to rush you to the vet to have your stomach pumped.  You were treated for alcohol poisoning.  We almost lost you that morning.

Taken at 10:13 am right before we had to rush you to the vet to have your stomach pumped. You were treated for alcohol poisoning. We almost lost you that morning.

 

Because we love you so much, we want to suggest that you get help at a rehab center in Arizona.  I want you around for a long time, Zoe, so that we can have a normal-ish family again because your alcoholism is tearing this family apart.  Please take this opportunity to start a new, healthy life by accepting our offer.  If you do, we will be there with you every step of the way on your road to recovery.

We both know that is not water in your bowl.

We both know that is not water in your bowl.

 

If you do not accept our offer for treatment or fail to complete the program, I will have no choice but to distance myself from you.  There will be no more treats between meals, no more playtime with the dangle-string toy, and (as hard as it will be to uphold) no more lap loving that makes you purr so loudly.  Trust me.  Your sobriety will be the best choice you have every made.

Love,
Cary