There Goes the Gayborhood

February 10, 2016 — 5 Comments

Dear Journal,

I’m assuming the process of moving is a bigger pain in the ass than having a prostate exam with sandpaper gloves worn by Dr. Jackhammer during a hemorrhoid flare-up. Closing on the house you own at the same time as closing on the one you are buying requires the alignment of Venus and Saturn during a full moon while sacrificing a virgin midget to the Gods of the Republican party, and since all the midgets I know are immoral whores, the home closings have been pushed to an undetermined date because the buyer’s mortgage company decided to order the appraisal shortly before our already-scheduled-months-ago closing date.

Thankfully there is comedy available to distract me from just giving in and bedding insanity after all its years of tempting proposition. As I’ve mentioned before, good comedy is a perfect crutch to hold you up during times when life is out of your control. Some probably believe sex to be a better crutch, but honestly, can you imagine anything more pitiful than sorrow sex?

To survive my current moving fiasco that is almost driving me angry enough to kick a cat and/or punch a baby, I have watched episodes of Gayborhood to quell my violent urges. This wacky, award winning web series from Colby Cameron Holt and Sam Probst has the perfect chemistry of clever dialogue, a talented cast who understand the importance of comedic timing, and colorful (yet familiar) characters.

In just the first three episodes alone (out of the 12 ten-minute-ish episodes you can find on Youtube), I laughed out loud at:


Leacey’s understanding of Grindr – “It’s like Google Map but for [bleep].”



Adrian as Specificity Jones casually fingering a shot glass like a loose asshole.



Adrian (as Specificity Hones) comprehending Clay’s name – “Like mud?”



Blaine trying to gay it up – “They can…they can do that.”



Sethe just not giving a shit. – “The last time I gave a [bleep] about that story was before the first time I heard it.”



Leacey’s failed analogy of the pains of love…or something – “It’s not like you don’t trust the stove, but…sometimes it burns you. Is that a thing?”



Clay sharing how he met Casey – “We just met a little while ago. He sent me his penis.”


And this one from D’Ante speaks for itself:


Indeed, D’Ante.

When I need another life-crutch (or just to laugh for the fuck of it), I’m watching Gayborhood again. I do it for the babies and cats. And I swear to Martha Stewart that even if the walls in my new house bleed or I’m raped nightly by a haggard succubus, will not move again. Never again.

clicked here to subscribe (of course, I could have also gone to



5 responses to There Goes the Gayborhood


    “I’m assuming the process of moving is a bigger pain in the ass than having a prostate exam with sandpaper gloves worn by Dr. Jackhammer during a hemorrhoid flare-up.”

    You are hilarious. Also, I never heard of anyone having so many midget friends. Will check out Gayborhood. If it’s as funny as this post, then thanks for pointing my attention to it!

    Liked by 1 person


    You will make it! I think.

    Liked by 1 person


    I’d rather swear AT Martha Stewart but, you know, those types can’t hear you through all the floral arrangements and fondant.

    Liked by 1 person

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